Dating a story is definitely part of the limited use, but the bulk of the answer falls into a legal area and it heavily depends on what is being mentioned, why, and the role it plays in the story. Please note: I am not a lawyer and this is not legal advice.
Typically, the worry with using real-life names, brands, etc. comes from trouble with: trademark infringement, trademark dilution, or tarnish and defamation.
Trademark infringement is unauthorized use of a name in a way that creates a likelihood of confusion as to the origin of the goods or services. This does not really apply to social media platforms.
Trademark dilution gives owners of (usually) famous brand names a legal right to prohibit others from using those names and making them less distinct. This is mostly where the social media issue comes from. Trademark owners tend not to like when brand names are used as generic terms or when their name is implied to be the name of all products. “Generic term “examples: Adobe doesn’t want people “photoshopping” things, they want them “edited in Photoshop”.
Google has occasionally thrown a fit over the term “googling”. “Not the name of all products” examples: ”Band-Aid” is a brand and not the catch-all term for “bandage”. “Kleenex” is a brand and not the name for just any tissue. The issue is with the genericizing of company brand names, not just mentioning the company as existing. You can still write “look it up on Google” with no issue because the name isn’t made generic with a term. You can skill mention “a box of Kleenex tissues” because that implies that Kleenexes aren’t the only tissues.
Tarnish and/or defamation can happen when a writer brand names a product and then falsely depicts it as being dangerous or defective, but this is definitively a more gray legal area.
For anything to officially be tarnish, it must be proven (in court) that some readers actually understood the “bad” depiction to be a statement of fact instead of fiction. Gray and messy at times, but can show up when you least expect it.
For you specific question, it depends on what the role of social media is in the story. “I saw your photos on Instagram” is a singularly fine statement. Showing a character using Instagram is also fine. Brand names can exist in fiction, just like song titles and novels can exist. However, if you wrote a story centering around how Instagram (specifically named in-story) was selling confidential customer information to make more money, you’re likely in the area of “defamation” and would be better off making up a company name. Same with if something bad happened to a character because they were using a social media platform (like if they were being stalked on Instagram). If you chose to use the term “instagramming”, then the company can also complain because of
genericizing and trademark dilution. That said, defamation is a bigger deal than infringement or dilution and is the one that’s more likely to land you in court instead of just getting a strongly worded letter.
Most writers, particularly those who intend to publish, do use work-arounds but in a way that still fits for the story. You’re “saw them online” example would work.
“I’ll facebook you later” –> “I’ll message you later” OR “I’ll DM you later” (“direct messaging” or “personal messaging” does not belong to any company and are specific terms to describe an action that doesn’t rely on using the brand name.)
“I’ll just photoshop it” –> “I’ll just edit it” OR “I’ll just edit it in Photoshop” (Like i keep saying, the unaltered name is fine as long as it doesn’t involve defamation.)
“Texting” is super generic and is always okay, “email” may or may not be outdated for some characters so only use it if it makes sense– it really depends on what level of detail you need for the story.
Assuming you’re avoiding all forms of defamation, brand names and social media platforms are fine to mention as a name alone, just not the bastardized term when the company name is turned into a verb or if the writing implies that the brand name is the name of the object or action itself. The route each writer takes should depend on the level of detail that the social media matters to the story, but it’s still always safer to avoid brand naming altogether. A name in passing is usually fine, but if the SM platform is going to play any form of active role in the story then it’s best to actually make up your own to avoid being too generic. Making up names and using generic terms for actions is always the best way to avoid all potential legal problems.
Good luck with your story!